Mindfulness Training for Personality Development

Those of you who know me well, know I’m a huge Mindfulness Training fan. And one that is always in awe of what it can do! And that’s exactly what we got to see last week. Its live effects.

It happened during a virtual Mentoring and Coaching session we were conducting for a group of leaders last week. We started Day 3 of the session with a Mindfulness meditation. And the effect was beyond what we had thought off and even wanted in that moment!

What happened?

We had a bunch of lively and extremely interactive leaders during Day 1 and 2 of the session. But Day 3 was quite different. Post the meditation, they became very quiet and interaction levels really plummeted! And you know how long this calming and relaxed effect lasted? Definitely the 4 hours that we spent with them, may be even more! And we could ascertain that this was not just a coincidence by their regained activity levels on Day 4!

Now that was a true example of the power of Mindfulness!

So, what is Mindfulness?

For those of you who are not well acquainted with the concept, you must be wondering what mindfulness is and how it is so powerful. Well, let me tell you…

Mindfulness is a beautiful practice that helps us connect to the present moment. You see, most of us stay either in the past or the future. So, its majorly thoughts about past regrets or worries and anxiety about the future. And guess what, neither of them make us feel good! In fact, these keep us feeling negative most of the time. And also make it even tougher to manage the not-so-pleasant emotions that get triggered by these thoughts.

The result?

Perpetual stress, along with a clouded pessimistic mind which is incapable of making good decisions or of being creative. Not to mention a lack of confidence, a bad attitude and an overall poor personality. Phew! That’s a lot to digest. But its actually what most of us are dealing with every day. And if you truly want to create a shift; one that changes you from the inside, from your very core, then Mindfulness Training is the way to go.

The Pillars of Mindfulness Training and how they help

Mindfulness has some pillars. I call them pillars and not rules because the fact is that rules give you a sense of right and wrong. And mindfulness aims at removing just that, the right and wrong that we assign to everything in and around us. If you look carefully, you will notice that we judge not only things around us but even subtler things like our thoughts and emotions. And the worst part is, we don’t leave it there. We go ahead to punish ourselves and others for these wrongs too! And I’m sure I don’t need to explain what effect that has on our communication, behaviour, self-talk, attitude and eventually personality!

It’s like we get stuck in a negative spiral which gets tough to break free from. In fact, even during Mindfulness training, we tend to follow on with the same habit initially. When we are unable to stay in the present moment, we scold ourselves for not being able to do so. And then starts the pre-recorded ‘I’m not good enough’ message again that often keeps playing as background noise in many of our heads!

Which brings me to the second pillar – Compassion and Kindness; Non-Judgment being the first. Mindfulness teaches us to be gentle with ourselves. It allows room for failure and mistakes. It reminds us again and again that it is alright to fall. What is important, is how soon we get up. This helps us tackle our fear of failure and gives us the courage to take on challenging tasks. It also works on slowly erasing the ‘I’m not good enough’ message that runs in our minds, the root cause of all our personality issues!

And how does Mindfulness improve our Personality?

It actually works on our personality in a rather holistic manner. Some of the ways in which it does this are:

• Increases awareness levels. This results in being able to see what is truly going on inside and outside us, rather than just viewing things from our pre-conditioned lens

• Improves acceptance levels. This helps us in managing our emotions and those of others around us, thereby improving emotional intelligence

• Helps manage change. Regular Mindfulness practise helps us in creating and managing change, one of those things most of us are uncomfortable with

• Reduces reactions to outside events. This improves our communication skills on the outside and our stress management capabilities on the inside

• Improves physical and mental health. Mindfulness practise has been found to have tremendous health benefits, which includes improving pain bearing capability and even creating positive changes in our brain

• Lowers the number of thoughts in our mind. This makes thinking clearer, contributing to better decision making and enhanced creativity

• Enhances focus. It improves our time management skills and helps us complete tasks faster than we could ever imagine

• Improves confidence levels. It helps us manage fear to come out of our comfort zone and accomplish challenging tasks with a positive outlook and plenty of zeal

Apart from all of these; it makes us calm, relaxed and happy individuals. Now that’s a personality I’m sure all of us would love to have!